Christianity QA

Question:

> Lack of romantic interest from the opposite sex is not the same thing as > abuse. > Unless you get this, you have little hope of ever pulling yourself out of > this > misogynistic self-pity pool.

And I suppose depriving people of food and shelter, BASIC NEEDS, isn’t abuse either? Deprivation of LOVE or even the RIGHT to FEEL is the worst kind of abuse there is. It’s dehumanising. > How have women "butchered" you?

My heart, my soul, my youth. My hopes and my dreams. Even my will to live. They savagely butchered all of them.

Response:

On 22 Dec 2004 00:33:52 GMT, jimsummer…@aol.com (Jim Summers87) wrote: >>Lack of romantic interest from the opposite sex is not the same thing as >>abuse. >  It certainly is abuse if the women’s standards are unreasonably high and thus >he is being denied legitimate opportunities for romantic happiness. >  How is being deprived of a fundamental psychological and emotional need not >considered abuse in your mind?

You are not being deprived of anything – there are plenty of "fatties" and "skanks" that would go for you – you’ve said so yourself. Solitary Soul -> http://users3.ev1.net/~solitarysoul/ —————————————————–         in some years, only 1% of a rabbit population survives.         that is what cleans the gene pool.         you don’t see ugly rabbits or other wildlife.                                       – severesocialanxiety

Response:

On Wed, 22 Dec 2004 11:37:26 +1100, "Darkfalz" <darkfalz.use…@gmail.com> wrote: >> Lack of romantic interest from the opposite sex is not the same thing as >> abuse. Unless you get this, you have little hope of ever pulling >> yourself out of  this misogynistic self-pity pool. >And I suppose depriving people of food and shelter, BASIC NEEDS, isn’t abuse >either?

You do not deserve to be given food nor shelter – that’s only something that a COMMUNIST would believe. You are not being deprived of the OPPORTUNITY to procure food and shelter  - the same can be said of love and intimacy. You could get all the love you wanted if you were willing to follow Rainier’s path and accept women who are less than ideal. >Deprivation of LOVE or even the RIGHT to FEEL is the worst kind of abuse >there is. It’s dehumanising.

It’s a simple matter of lowering your standards. >> How have women "butchered" you? >My heart, my soul, my youth. My hopes and my dreams. Even my will to live. >They savagely butchered all of them.

You must still have your will to live. How do I know this? You’re still here, aren’t you? If you can’t get what you’re hoping for, then maybe your hopes are unrealistic  - perhaps you need a new set of hopes. Solitary Soul -> http://users3.ev1.net/~solitarysoul/ —————————————————–         in some years, only 1% of a rabbit population survives.         that is what cleans the gene pool.         you don’t see ugly rabbits or other wildlife.                                       – severesocialanxiety

Response:

—–BEGIN PGP SIGNED MESSAGE—– Hash: SHA1 In article <32rtuoF3qmpq…@individual.net> Darkfalz <darkfalz.use…@gmail.com> wrote: >> Lack of romantic interest from the opposite sex is not the same thing >> as abuse.

This is sorta true… >> Unless you get this, you have little hope of ever pulling yourself >> out of this misogynistic self-pity pool.

This certainly is… >Deprivation of LOVE or even the RIGHT to FEEL is the worst kind of abuse >there is. It’s dehumanising.

And this is sorta true also.  What’s particularly erm, dehumanising, is that *nobody in particular* is doing the abuse!  It’s an emergent phenomenon – action by (collective) inaction. >> How have women "butchered" you? >My heart, my soul, my youth. My hopes and my dreams. Even my will to >live.  They savagely butchered all of them.

Who, in particular? – — "IBM has more patent litigation lawyers than SCO has employees." – unknown —–BEGIN PGP SIGNATURE—– Version: GnuPG v1.0.4 (GNU/Linux) Comment: For info see http://www.gnupg.org iD8DBQFByRBF/FmLrNfLpjMRAnCfAKCQmUmatk7YYZtrTeVi5Fxf+Z004gCffqN3 5OnTBDfkYLixp3qMf3fLcOc= =9z0T —–END PGP SIGNATURE—–

Response:

In news:cqadcb015or@drn.newsguy.com, GoddessBaybee <goddessbay…@yahoo.com> wrote : – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -> In article <32r964F3mtqh…@individual.net>, Darkfalz says… > > "Sklenge" <skle…@yahoo.co.uk> wrote in message > > news:BDEDF843.31D61%sklenge@yahoo.co.uk… > > > Darkfalz wrote: > > > > > Darkfaltz <You will be going to hell.> you know if you gave > > > > > someone half a > > > > > chance you might just like someone…i really feel bad you > > > > > hate me so much > > > > > and im not writing this expecting anything hardly kind from > > > > > you…think about what you write people and think how you > > > > > would feel if you were them. > > > > That’s funny, a woman lecturing me on "how would it feel if I > > > > said that to > > > > you". > > > > I could sit here and type for three months straight nothing but > > > > abuse to women, and it still wouldn’t make a dent on the abuse > > > > I have received from them in my life time. > Lack of romantic interest from the opposite sex is not the same thing > as abuse. Unless you get this, you have little hope of ever pulling > yourself out of this misogynistic self-pity pool.

    It’s not as simple as that : women are supposed to be passive. Men are supposed to be active and aggressive. Thus, the worst thing that can happen to a woman is that she gets abused (beaten, or forced sex) by a very aggressive guy. And the worst thing that can happen to a man is to be unable to be aggressive, then, he remains alone all his life.     Thus, in the world, only women really suffer. When the worst happens to a woman, it’s horrible and unfair, and it’s feminism. When the worst happens to a man, it’s "self pity pool" and misogyny.     The only thing that doesn’t fit your picture is the suicide rates, 3 times higher for males… (if you only consider real suicides, not self-pity)     My take on things is that as women are allowed to be passive, they can both receive very good things (often), like positive attention from males without having to do anything to deserve it, and very bad things (abuse, rarely). While men receive… nothing. And if they complain, then they’re not real men, they’re "whiners".     But now I wonder who are the real ungrateful selfish whiners…

Response:

- Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -Solitary Soul wrote: > On Mon, 20 Dec 2004 18:16:49 -0500, "disneychick" > <tshhhh…@hotmail.com> wrote: > >Darkfaltz <You will be going to hell.> you know if you gave someone > half a > > chance you might just like someone…i really feel bad you hate me > > so much and im not writing this expecting anything hardly kind from > > you…think about what you write people and think how you would > > feel if you were them. > He doesn’t feel anything for anyone but himself. > >SS <STOP begging for table scraps.> trying hard not to be hurt by > that bc > > youve like said it a few times. he’s persuing me…im not begging. > It was a metaphor – I didn’t mean that you’re doing the pursuing. > > <It’s "rare" for you because of your SP – that’s why I’m STRONGLY > > urging you to hold off on any sort of meaningful relationship until > > you’ve been > >able to get your head together.> I know im unsocial big time…but > isnt a > > relationship one where people HELP each other?? Mark isn’t super > > extroverted…actually he is sort of but hes mostly real busy > > raising his kids and working…single parenting is wicked hard and > > hes got a ton of obstacles but hes sooooo un affected negatively at > > all. thats very appealing to me. > > <the main reason why the both of you have such difficulty in finding > > potential BF’s is that you both live within > > your own little boxes – sticking your heads out every once in a > > while to > >see what the weather’s like.> this is and isnt true. Yes im home > > alot…yes i dont socialize, but the whole dynamics of where i > > lives real weird…theres like NO guys hardly it seems……and i > > am real anxiety prone so if i have to compete at all im out. so i > > dont even try to compete…..but to be honest if it wasnt like this > > id probably be home alot anyway. > So then the answer is to get out of that place. Get a career going, > figure out who you are, get your head together, then relocate. > I know that you wouldn’t have any problems finding a WAAAAAAY better > SO around here (in South Texas).

meaning u! — ———————————————————————— Ms Pnoopie Pnats Usnet Legend http://mspoopiepants.blogspot.com/ ———————————————————————— —————- my socks are off Vic, come and get my feet NOW!! ———————————————————————— —————

Response:

>Lack of romantic interest from the opposite sex is not the same thing as >abuse.

  It certainly is abuse if the women’s standards are unreasonably high and thus he is being denied legitimate opportunities for romantic happiness.   How is being deprived of a fundamental psychological and emotional need not considered abuse in your mind?

Response:

On Mon, 20 Dec 2004 18:16:49 -0500, "disneychick" <tshhhh…@hotmail.com> wrote: >Darkfaltz <You will be going to hell.> you know if you gave someone half a >chance you might just like someone…i really feel bad you hate me so much >and im not writing this expecting anything hardly kind from you…think >about what you write people and think how you would feel if you were >them.

He doesn’t feel anything for anyone but himself. >SS <STOP begging for table scraps.> trying hard not to be hurt by that bc >youve like said it a few times. he’s persuing me…im not begging.

It was a metaphor – I didn’t mean that you’re doing the pursuing. – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -><It’s "rare" for you because of your SP – that’s why I’m STRONGLY urging >you to hold off on any sort of meaningful relationship until you’ve been >able to get your head together.> I know im unsocial big time…but isnt a >relationship one where people HELP each other?? Mark isn’t super >extroverted…actually he is sort of but hes mostly real busy raising his >kids and working…single parenting is wicked hard and hes got a ton of >obstacles but hes sooooo un affected negatively at all. thats very >appealing to me. ><the main reason why the both of you have such difficulty in finding >potential BF’s is that you both live within >your own little boxes – sticking your heads out every once in a while to >see what the weather’s like.> this is and isnt true. Yes im home >alot…yes i dont socialize, but the whole dynamics of where i lives real >weird…theres like NO guys hardly it seems……and i am real anxiety >prone so if i have to compete at all im out. so i dont even try to >compete…..but to be honest if it wasnt like this id probably be home >alot anyway.

So then the answer is to get out of that place. Get a career going, figure out who you are, get your head together, then relocate. I know that you wouldn’t have any problems finding a WAAAAAAY better SO around here (in South Texas). ><ESPECIALLY when you’re a girl with a strong Christian faith: There are a >lot of guys looking for girls like that. The problem is, you’re making >yourself VERY difficult to find.> lots of OLD people at my church…so >thats out.

Then you need to find a new church. ><BTW: What do your parents think about this guy?> well, they don’t really >know yet…not really telling them much.

You NEED to tell them EVERYTHING. What about your counselor? What did your counselor say? Solitary Soul -> http://users3.ev1.net/~solitarysoul/ —————————————————– Welcome to alt.support.shyness, also known as The *PAIN* Club.                                        - Solitary Soul

Response:

"F r a.n.k." <f…@mail.net> wrote in message news:32oum3F3pik1sU1@individual.net… > In news:ddd7a64077fa990e15b5858b12160083@localhost.talkaboutsupport.com, > disneychick <tshhhh…@hotmail.com> wrote : >    Hi Trisha. I hadn’t seen the 1st thread, so I’ve just been catching up. >  For now I haven’t read the other’s answers, but I’m afraid I’m going > to > say what you don’t want to hear : that he’s nearly 40… I think that you > feel really lonely (I can  understand that, trust me), and you feel a bit > desperate… So I don’t say that this guy is not a good guy, but I’m sure > you could find someone your age… Or a bit closer to your age…

I don’t think age alone should be a factor not to date someone.  I believe a successful relationship could occur with people of significantly different ages.  That being said, it is also very important to step back and do some honest analysis as to whether the two people are truly compatible and have if their short and long term goals are similar. The guy could really be a good guy whose sincerely interested in Trisha or he could be just an older guy looking to score with some young hottie so its important that she really is sure of his intentions rather than go for it and get hurt bad.  Every relationship has its risks though so I don’t know a valid reason why this one should be avoided more than any other.

Response:

> Darkfaltz <You will be going to hell.> you know if you gave someone half a > chance you might just like someone…i really feel bad you hate me so much > and im not writing this expecting anything hardly kind from you…think > about what you write people and think how you would feel if you were > them.

That’s funny, a woman lecturing me on "how would it feel if I said that to you". I could sit here and type for three months straight nothing but abuse to women, and it still wouldn’t make a dent on the abuse I have received from them in my life time. I hope Churchill, Stalin and Roosevelt are keeping the fires of hell hot enough for you.

Response:

darkfalz said: >You will be going to hell.

methinks you’re looking forward to the company. – k i t z – if i could start again a million miles away i would keep myself i would find a way

Response:

Darkfalz wrote: >> Darkfaltz <You will be going to hell.> you know if you gave someone half a >> chance you might just like someone…i really feel bad you hate me so much >> and im not writing this expecting anything hardly kind from you…think >> about what you write people and think how you would feel if you were >> them. > That’s funny, a woman lecturing me on "how would it feel if I said that to > you". > I could sit here and type for three months straight nothing but abuse to > women, and it still wouldn’t make a dent on the abuse I have received from > them in my life time.

So you believe in an eye for an eye do you? How very Old Testament of you.

Response:

"Sklenge" <skle…@yahoo.co.uk> wrote in message

news:BDEDF843.31D61%sklenge@yahoo.co.uk… – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -> Darkfalz wrote: >>> Darkfaltz <You will be going to hell.> you know if you gave someone half >>> a >>> chance you might just like someone…i really feel bad you hate me so >>> much >>> and im not writing this expecting anything hardly kind from you…think >>> about what you write people and think how you would feel if you were >>> them. >> That’s funny, a woman lecturing me on "how would it feel if I said that >> to >> you". >> I could sit here and type for three months straight nothing but abuse to >> women, and it still wouldn’t make a dent on the abuse I have received >> from >> them in my life time. > So you believe in an eye for an eye do you? > How very Old Testament of you.

Obviously I don’t, or I would be out butchering women as we speak.

Response:

hey again,  this is so cool you guys all talking to me about this. I’m so excited to be able to share this with people whor like me and understand.  Ok…Im going to answer back everone who wrote me (almost) so this will take awhile. If your looking for your reply just scrolll down to your name. Latro – <Maybe competition for outgoing, flirtatious single men is vicious.> its terrible here…they fight over even the guys who r married even. <What’s your definition of quality? If you believe it’s personality/attitude toward you alone, remember that it is more transitory than wealth or beauty and could easily be a facade.> Well, he seems real sincere and children are unconditional…they adore mark its really really cool watching them!!! ci+ <and probably ss thinks you’re hot.. (doh.. heh heh)> ss is kind of my online conscience…he gives the best advice i think and is consistant. although in spite of what he says i think hes trying to selp me feel better about myself.  i know i have terrible self esteem – i hate myself most days bc stuff others can do is so hard for me even regular easy stuff like looking people in the eye. anyway… Darkfaltz <You will be going to hell.> you know if you gave someone half a chance you might just like someone…i really feel bad you hate me so much and im not writing this expecting anything hardly kind from you…think about what you write people and think how you would feel if you were them. SS <STOP begging for table scraps.> trying hard not to be hurt by that bc youve like said it a few times. he’s persuing me…im not begging. <It’s "rare" for you because of your SP – that’s why I’m STRONGLY urging you to hold off on any sort of meaningful relationship until you’ve been able to get your head together.> I know im unsocial big time…but isnt a relationship one where people HELP each other?? Mark isn’t super extroverted…actually he is sort of but hes mostly real busy raising his kids and working…single parenting is wicked hard and hes got a ton of obstacles but hes sooooo un affected negatively at all. thats very appealing to me. <the main reason why the both of you have such difficulty in finding potential BF’s is that you both live within your own little boxes – sticking your heads out every once in a while to see what the weather’s like.> this is and isnt true. Yes im home alot…yes i dont socialize, but the whole dynamics of where i lives real weird…theres like NO guys hardly it seems……and i am real anxiety prone so if i have to compete at all im out. so i dont even try to compete…..but to be honest if it wasnt like this id probably be home alot anyway. <ESPECIALLY when you’re a girl with a strong Christian faith: There are a lot of guys looking for girls like that. The problem is, you’re making yourself VERY difficult to find.> lots of OLD people at my church…so thats out. <BTW: What do your parents think about this guy?> well, they don’t really know yet…not really telling them much. <We shouldn’t lie to each other though – just to bolster self-esteem.That isn’t very useful, IMO.> no your right as usual…sorry i suggested it. LIZ <is this teh same guy you were tellin me abowt backe in Septemberrr?one that werks with u?> hey u…how come they give me a hard time when i write that way. (((hugs))) anyway – i dont think so bc Marks someone sort of new to me….i had probs with guys in maintenance or actually, this one guy was harrassing me about work orders i knew NOTHING about. Marks sort of a prgm coordinator for job coaches that work w/ people whor going into jobs like schools …. sort of hard to write/describe what that whole thing is. independent living is where i work but its sort of a big program. Mark introduced himself when i started and has sort of guided me here and there but little by little has been more and more helpful unlike my supervisor jen whos a real bitch…. howr you liz?? hope all is well. (((hugs))) Frank <that he’s nearly 40… I think that you feel really lonely (I can  understand that, trust me), and you feel a bit desperate… > I dont understand whats the big deal about the age thing. no im not desperate but thanks for caring anyway. < but I’m sure you could find someone your age…> guys my age are real funny about playing with your mind i think plus all they want to do is party. this man wants nothing and has asked nothing from me other than invite me to his home. Im the one whos hoping its for something more than just visits…maybe it is maybe not..i dont want to ruin it if it is tho. <Anyway, good luck to u. As parents say, all I want is u to be happy!> (((hugs))) thank you….

Response:

In article <32r964F3mtqh…@individual.net>, Darkfalz says… – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text ->"Sklenge" <skle…@yahoo.co.uk> wrote in message >news:BDEDF843.31D61%sklenge@yahoo.co.uk… >> Darkfalz wrote: >>>> Darkfaltz <You will be going to hell.> you know if you gave someone half >>>> a >>>> chance you might just like someone…i really feel bad you hate me so >>>> much >>>> and im not writing this expecting anything hardly kind from you…think >>>> about what you write people and think how you would feel if you were >>>> them. >>> That’s funny, a woman lecturing me on "how would it feel if I said that >>> to >>> you". >>> I could sit here and type for three months straight nothing but abuse to >>> women, and it still wouldn’t make a dent on the abuse I have received >>> from them in my life time.

Lack of romantic interest from the opposite sex is not the same thing as abuse. Unless you get this, you have little hope of ever pulling yourself out of this misogynistic self-pity pool. >> So you believe in an eye for an eye do you? >> How very Old Testament of you. >Obviously I don’t, or I would be out butchering women as we speak.

How have women "butchered" you? Baybee PS  BTW, do ya think women over the age of 30 would be justified     in butchering you?

Response:

hey again,  this is so cool you guys all talking to me about this. I’m so excited to be able to share this with people whor like me and understand.  Ok…Im going to answer back everone who wrote me (almost) so this will take awhile. If your looking for your reply just scrolll down to your name. Latro – <Maybe competition for outgoing, flirtatious single men is vicious.> its terrible here…they fight over even the guys who r married even. <What’s your definition of quality? If you believe it’s personality/attitude toward you alone, remember that it is more transitory than wealth or beauty and could easily be a facade.> Well, he seems real sincere and children are unconditional…they adore mark its really really cool watching them!!! ci+ <and probably ss thinks you’re hot.. (doh.. heh heh)> ss is kind of my online conscience…he gives the best advice i think and is consistant. although in spite of what he says i think hes trying to help me feel better about myself.  i know i have terrible self esteem – i hate myself most days bc stuff others can do is so hard for me even regular easy stuff like looking people in the eye. anyway… Darkfaltz <You will be going to hell.> you know if you gave someone half a chance you might just like someone…i really feel bad you hate me so much and im not writing this expecting anything hardly kind from you…think about what you write people and think how you would feel if you were them. SS <STOP begging for table scraps.> trying hard not to be hurt by that bc youve like said it a few times. he’s persuing me…im not begging. <It’s "rare" for you because of your SP – that’s why I’m STRONGLY urging you to hold off on any sort of meaningful relationship until you’ve been able to get your head together.> I know im unsocial big time…but isnt a relationship one where people HELP each other?? Mark isn’t super extroverted…actually he is sort of but hes mostly real busy raising his kids and working…single parenting is wicked hard and hes got a ton of obstacles but hes sooooo un affected negatively at all. thats very appealing to me. <the main reason why the both of you have such difficulty in finding potential BF’s is that you both live within your own little boxes – sticking your heads out every once in a while to see what the weather’s like.> this is and isnt true. Yes im home alot…yes i dont socialize, but the whole dynamics of where i lives real weird…theres like NO guys hardly it seems……and i am real anxiety prone so if i have to compete at all im out. so i dont even try to compete…..but to be honest if it wasnt like this id probably be home alot anyway. <ESPECIALLY when you’re a girl with a strong Christian faith: There are a lot of guys looking for girls like that. The problem is, you’re making yourself VERY difficult to find.> lots of OLD people at my church…so thats out. <BTW: What do your parents think about this guy?> well, they don’t really know yet…not really telling them much. <We shouldn’t lie to each other though – just to bolster self-esteem.That isn’t very useful, IMO.> no your right as usual…sorry i suggested it. LIZ <is this teh same guy you were tellin me abowt backe in Septemberrr?one that werks with u?> hey u…how come they give me a hard time when i write that way. (((hugs))) anyway – i dont think so bc Marks someone sort of new to me….i had probs with guys in maintenance or actually, this one guy was harrassing me about work orders i knew NOTHING about. Marks sort of a prgm coordinator for job coaches that work w/ people whor going into jobs like schools …. sort of hard to write/describe what that whole thing is. independent living is where i work but its sort of a big program. Mark introduced himself when i started and has sort of guided me here and there but little by little has been more and more helpful unlike my supervisor jen whos a real bitch…. howr you liz?? hope all is well. (((hugs))) Frank <that he’s nearly 40… I think that you feel really lonely (I can  understand that, trust me), and you feel a bit desperate… > I dont understand whats the big deal about the age thing. no im not desperate but thanks for caring anyway. < but I’m sure you could find someone your age…> guys my age are real funny about playing with your mind i think plus all they want to do is party. this man wants nothing and has asked nothing from me other than invite me to his home. Im the one whos hoping its for something more than just visits…maybe it is maybe not..i dont want to ruin it if it is tho. <Anyway, good luck to u. As parents say, all I want is u to be happy!> (((hugs))) thank you….

Response:

- Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -On Mon, 20 Dec 2004 22:53:03 +1100, "Darkfalz" <darkfalz.use…@gmail.com> wrote: >"disneychick" <tshhhh…@hotmail.com> wrote in message >news:ddd7a64077fa990e15b5858b12160083@localhost.talkaboutsupport.com… >> Well, no church date last night bc the heat wasn’t working real good there >> – but we talked on the phone for like an hour. So theres nothing to report >> back to you guys. but as soon as there is ill let you guys know… >> One thing I want to say, I want to say I am very surprised by how many >> people wrote me giving support. Thank you so much…..this place must be >> changing for the better bc in the past Id get like 10 mean replies to one >> good one.  I feel you support me…thank you very much!!! (((hugs))) >> SS likes to give real good advice to people and im not surprised he wants >> me to worry about a career and not a relationship…..you know what tho, >> everyone here knows that relationships that are good are real rare. and I >> know i just met mark but if i dont take the time to see if it might work, >> i might miss a real good chance with someone really really great.  where i >> live – the competition for single guys is VICIOUS….so having some guy >> whos quality persuing ME is rare. >> ss is kind about looks to bc im no hottie either…but thank you so much >> for telling everyone good things like that because you know what, we >> should be telling each other stuff like that allllll the time. we should >> support each other and give alot of advice to each other. >You will be going to hell.

Why? Trisha has a strong Christian faith – quite likely stronger than yours. As I recall: Aren’t you an atheist, Darkfalz? Solitary Soul -> http://users3.ev1.net/~solitarysoul/ —————————————————– Welcome to alt.support.shyness, also known as The *PAIN* Club.                                        - Solitary Soul

Response:

- Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -disneychick wrote: > Well, no church date last night bc the heat wasn’t working real good > there – but we talked on the phone for like an hour. So theres > nothing to report back to you guys. but as soon as there is ill let > you guys know… > One thing I want to say, I want to say I am very surprised by how many > people wrote me giving support. Thank you so much…..this place must > be changing for the better bc in the past Id get like 10 mean replies > to one good one.  I feel you support me…thank you very much!!! > (((hugs))) > SS likes to give real good advice to people and im not surprised he > wants me to worry about a career and not a relationship…..you know > what tho, everyone here knows that relationships that are good are > real rare. and I know i just met mark but if i dont take the time to > see if it might work, i might miss a real good chance with someone > really really great.  where i live – the competition for single guys > is VICIOUS….so having some guy whos quality persuing ME is rare. > ss is kind about looks to bc im no hottie either…but thank you so > much for telling everyone good things like that because you know > what, we should be telling each other stuff like that allllll the > time. we should support each other and give alot of advice to each > other.

is this teh same guy you were tellin me abowt backe in Septemberrr? one that werks with u? — ———————————————————————— Ms Pnoopie Pnats Usnet Legend http://mspoopiepants.blogspot.com/ ———————————————————————— —————- my socks are off Vic, come and get my feet NOW!! ———————————————————————— —————

Response:

On 20 Dec 2004 19:16:35 GMT, "Hot Pnats" <Sl…@slorp.cum.oh!> wrote: – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text ->disneychick wrote: >> Well, no church date last night bc the heat wasn’t working real good >> there – but we talked on the phone for like an hour. So theres >> nothing to report back to you guys. but as soon as there is ill let >> you guys know… >> One thing I want to say, I want to say I am very surprised by how many >> people wrote me giving support. Thank you so much…..this place must >> be changing for the better bc in the past Id get like 10 mean replies >> to one good one.  I feel you support me…thank you very much!!! >> (((hugs))) >> SS likes to give real good advice to people and im not surprised he >> wants me to worry about a career and not a relationship…..you know >> what tho, everyone here knows that relationships that are good are >> real rare. and I know i just met mark but if i dont take the time to >> see if it might work, i might miss a real good chance with someone >> really really great.  where i live – the competition for single guys >> is VICIOUS….so having some guy whos quality persuing ME is rare. >> ss is kind about looks to bc im no hottie either…but thank you so >> much for telling everyone good things like that because you know >> what, we should be telling each other stuff like that allllll the >> time. we should support each other and give alot of advice to each >> other. >is this teh same guy you were tellin me abowt backe in Septemberrr? >one that werks with u?

I believe that it is. Solitary Soul -> http://users3.ev1.net/~solitarysoul/ —————————————————– Welcome to alt.support.shyness, also known as The *PAIN* Club.                                        - Solitary Soul

Response:

In news:ddd7a64077fa990e15b5858b12160083@localhost.talkaboutsupport.com, disneychick <tshhhh…@hotmail.com> wrote : – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -> Well, no church date last night bc the heat wasn’t working real good > there – but we talked on the phone for like an hour. So theres > nothing to report back to you guys. but as soon as there is ill let > you guys know… > One thing I want to say, I want to say I am very surprised by how many > people wrote me giving support. Thank you so much…..this place must > be changing for the better bc in the past Id get like 10 mean replies > to one good one.  I feel you support me…thank you very much!!! > (((hugs))) > SS likes to give real good advice to people and im not surprised he > wants me to worry about a career and not a relationship…..you know > what tho, everyone here knows that relationships that are good are > real rare. and I know i just met mark but if i dont take the time to > see if it might work, i might miss a real good chance with someone > really really great.  where i live – the competition for single guys > is VICIOUS….so having some guy whos quality persuing ME is rare. > ss is kind about looks to bc im no hottie either…but thank you so > much for telling everyone good things like that because you know > what, we should be telling each other stuff like that allllll the > time. we should support each other and give alot of advice to each > other.

    Hi Trisha. I hadn’t seen the 1st thread, so I’ve just been catching up.  For now I haven’t read the other’s answers, but I’m afraid I’m going to say what you don’t want to hear : that he’s nearly 40… I think that you feel really lonely (I can  understand that, trust me), and you feel a bit desperate… So I don’t say that this guy is not a good guy, but I’m sure you could find someone your age… Or a bit closer to your age… Have you talked about it with your parents? What do they say? He’s still older than the one you were with before… I don’t want to ruin your hopes and excitement, but I think you should try to cool down a little, and really think about it. If you just wanted to have an "affair" with a mature man, then I’d say go for it, but I know that you want something serious… Maybe you’ll tell me it’s stupid to judge people just by their age… But I don’t know, I must be very traditional at core…   [and of course I'm jealous because I don't think that being without a bf for one year is very long... It's always the same thing when a girl posts to a.s.s. She never stays single for long, while the guys are left out and can't do nothing more than watching the other's lives... Even though I've just advised you to try to remain single for a little longer... Maybe it's because of the jealousy, who knows!?]     Anyway, good luck to u. As parents say, all I want is u to be happy! — << You see everything, you see every part You see all my light, and you love my dark You dig everything of which I’m ashamed There’s not anything to which you can’t relate And you’re still here >>         Alanis Morissette – Everything

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Well, no church date last night bc the heat wasn’t working real good there – but we talked on the phone for like an hour. So theres nothing to report back to you guys. but as soon as there is ill let you guys know… One thing I want to say, I want to say I am very surprised by how many people wrote me giving support. Thank you so much…..this place must be changing for the better bc in the past Id get like 10 mean replies to one good one.  I feel you support me…thank you very much!!! (((hugs))) SS likes to give real good advice to people and im not surprised he wants me to worry about a career and not a relationship…..you know what tho, everyone here knows that relationships that are good are real rare. and I know i just met mark but if i dont take the time to see if it might work, i might miss a real good chance with someone really really great.  where i live – the competition for single guys is VICIOUS….so having some guy whos quality persuing ME is rare. ss is kind about looks to bc im no hottie either…but thank you so much for telling everyone good things like that because you know what, we should be telling each other stuff like that allllll the time. we should support each other and give alot of advice to each other.

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On Mon, 20 Dec 2004 04:07:18 -0500, "disneychick" <tshhhh…@hotmail.com> wrote: >Well, no church date last night bc the heat wasn’t working real good there >- but we talked on the phone for like an hour.

Wow! I don’t think I’ll ever learn to sustain a conversation for an hour. I suppose those’re the kind of men women want. > So theres nothing to report >back to you guys. but as soon as there is ill let you guys know… >One thing I want to say, I want to say I am very surprised by how many >people wrote me giving support. Thank you so much…..this place must be >changing for the better bc in the past Id get like 10 mean replies to one >good one.  I feel you support me…thank you very much!!! (((hugs))) >SS likes to give real good advice to people and im not surprised he wants >me to worry about a career and not a relationship….

Actually, he advised you to think about your prospective SO’s earning potential if you’re not going to work. There is nothing wrong with a woman staying home. >.you know what tho, >everyone here knows that relationships that are good are real rare. and I >know i just met mark but if i dont take the time to see if it might work, >i might miss a real good chance with someone really really great.  where i >live – the competition for single guys is VICIOUS

Maybe competition for outgoing, flirtatious single men is vicious. >….so having some guy >whos quality persuing ME is rare.

What’s your definition of quality? If you believe it’s personality/attitude toward you alone, remember that it is more transitory than wealth or beauty and could easily be a facade. >ss is kind about looks to bc im no hottie either…but thank you so much >for telling everyone good things like that because you know what, we >should be telling each other stuff like that allllll the time. we should >support each other and give alot of advice to each other.

formerly Raul

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Latro <n…@nowhere.com> in news:ha8ds0hqd5phb15kvpej9h8m8arm8u3rib@4ax.com: > On Mon, 20 Dec 2004 04:07:18 -0500, "disneychick" > <tshhhh…@hotmail.com> wrote: >>Well, no church date last night bc the heat wasn’t working real good >>there – but we talked on the phone for like an hour. > Wow! I don’t think I’ll ever learn to sustain a conversation for an > hour. I suppose those’re the kind of men women want.

i don’t want to seem VC-like, but here’s a link… http://groups.google.co.nz/groups?q=convo+conversation+%7C+maneuver&h… 8&group=alt.support.shyness&scoring=d&selm=Xns95BE1CDC11CB8ci%4064.85.239.1 9&rnum=1 and if you’ve got questions about omitted detail.. … >>(((hugs)))

mmm … >>….so having some guy whos quality persuing ME is rare. > What’s your definition of quality? If you believe it’s > personality/attitude toward you alone, remember that it is more > transitory than wealth or beauty and could easily be a facade.

yes… if charm/whatever is a facade then it’s even *less* than transitory.. >>ss is kind about looks to bc im no hottie either…but thank you so >>much for telling everyone good things like that because you know what, >>we should be telling each other stuff like that allllll the time. we >>should support each other and give alot of advice to each other.

and probably ss thinks you’re hot.. (doh.. heh heh)

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"disneychick" <tshhhh…@hotmail.com> wrote in message

news:ddd7a64077fa990e15b5858b12160083@localhost.talkaboutsupport.com… – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -> Well, no church date last night bc the heat wasn’t working real good there > – but we talked on the phone for like an hour. So theres nothing to report > back to you guys. but as soon as there is ill let you guys know… > One thing I want to say, I want to say I am very surprised by how many > people wrote me giving support. Thank you so much…..this place must be > changing for the better bc in the past Id get like 10 mean replies to one > good one.  I feel you support me…thank you very much!!! (((hugs))) > SS likes to give real good advice to people and im not surprised he wants > me to worry about a career and not a relationship…..you know what tho, > everyone here knows that relationships that are good are real rare. and I > know i just met mark but if i dont take the time to see if it might work, > i might miss a real good chance with someone really really great.  where i > live – the competition for single guys is VICIOUS….so having some guy > whos quality persuing ME is rare. > ss is kind about looks to bc im no hottie either…but thank you so much > for telling everyone good things like that because you know what, we > should be telling each other stuff like that allllll the time. we should > support each other and give alot of advice to each other.

You will be going to hell.

Response:

On Mon, 20 Dec 2004 04:07:18 -0500, "disneychick" <tshhhh…@hotmail.com> wrote: >Well, no church date last night bc the heat wasn’t working real good there >- but we talked on the phone for like an hour. So theres nothing to report >back to you guys. but as soon as there is ill let you guys know… >One thing I want to say, I want to say I am very surprised by how many >people wrote me giving support. Thank you so much…..this place must be >changing for the better bc in the past Id get like 10 mean replies to one >good one.  I feel you support me…thank you very much!!! (((hugs))) >SS likes to give real good advice to people and im not surprised he wants >me to worry about a career and not a relationship…..you know what tho, >everyone here knows that relationships that are good are real rare.

No – they are NOT all that rare – maybe for you, as the only relationship that you’ve had was more by accident than anything else: Your ex-fianc was the son of a friend of your father’s – so it was a matter of the guy being in the right place at the right time. The same thing is happening here. STOP begging for table scraps. > and I >know i just met mark but if i dont take the time to see if it might work, >i might miss a real good chance with someone really really great.  where i >live – the competition for single guys is VICIOUS….so having some guy >whos quality persuing ME is rare.

It’s "rare" for you because of your SP – that’s why I’m STRONGLY urging you to hold off on any sort of meaningful relationship until you’ve been able to get your head together. I look at you and I’m reminded of RK – the main reason why the both of you have such difficulty in finding potential BF’s is that you both live within your own little boxes – sticking your heads out every once in a while to see what the weather’s like. The difference is that RK has a viable career going (software engineer – and this group would be quite impressed if they knew what she does), and she’s in the process of moving out of her parent’s house – she’s making some sort of progress (albeit slowly). If you were better able to function in social circumstances, you could have SEVERAL "quality" guys to choose from – ESPECIALLY when you’re a girl with a strong Christian faith: There are a lot of guys looking for girls like that. The problem is, you’re making yourself VERY difficult to find. I’ll repeat what I’ve told you before: DO NOT get too involved with this guy  - you will regret it in the future. You have better options, but you have to get your act together before you can realize those options. BTW: What do your parents think about this guy? What happened to the mother of this guy’s children?  … how did the relationship end with her? >ss is kind about looks to bc im no hottie either…

Take my word for it: You’re hot enough – at least a 9, and I believe that a lot of the guys in here would give you a 10. That you don’t think of yourself as being hot is a product of your own low self-esteem. *takes another look at Trisha’s pic* Yep – definitely hot. Your problem is your lack of social skills – SP. >but thank you so much >for telling everyone good things like that because you know what, we >should be telling each other stuff like that allllll the time. we should >support each other and give alot of advice to each other.

We shouldn’t lie to each other though – just to bolster self-esteem. That isn’t very useful, IMO. I’ve always tried to be straight with people  - and I’m being straight with you, Trisha. Solitary Soul -> http://users3.ev1.net/~solitarysoul/ —————————————————– Welcome to alt.support.shyness, also known as The *PAIN* Club.                                        - Solitary Soul

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