Christianity QA

Question:

I had failed for 15 months to find a local support group for low carb. However, I have discovered a group with zillions of chapters that meet once a week.  It is non-profit and only costs $20 to join.  http://www.tops.org/ They do not mind a person doing low carb. This is a very old organization.

As far as I know they are a spin-off from Overeaters Anonymous so they are a 12-step group.  12-step groups are some of the best support groups around.  I’ve read that OA has a better 5-year retention rate than any other system including WW. This makes sense given that they preach you need to come weekly for the rest of your life. Half of my local group is composed of women who are 70 years old, or older.  The group is very much in need of new blood.  24 members locally.  They are all women except for the one man that is the leader of the group.  He begged me to stay.

Chuckle.  They didn’t one of the women take charge? They have several recitations that have a religious tone to them.

Consistant with a 12-step program.  They don’t require any particular religion but anyone in a non-Christian religion who is not in complete comfort with their own faith is likely to find the fact that they are majority Christians a source of discomfort.  Christians tend to think that anyone religious or spiritual must also be Christian.  Part of being in the majority and therefore not exposed to variety I suspect. The 12th step goes something like "Having undergone a spiritual reawakening as a result of our efforts, we go out into the world to help others who are suffering from our affliction."  12 steps groups pray at most of their mettings. The theme seemed to be confessing their emotional eating….  (Not something I believe in.)

Don’t only see it on the surface.  These folks have a chance to spend year after year working through any emotional issue they have with the help of the group. Being at OA/TOPS their emotional issues tend to come out through emotional eating. I think the Peter Principle could be twisted to apply to the members.

That’s one way of looking at it.  In AA the ones who are able to do the 13th step are really the ones who weren’t addicted in the first place.  So you need to still have issues to think it worth going.  But is that a bad thing?  Fumbling through is still working your issues. They have a subgroup called "KOPS" at the meeting, who are members who are at their goal weight.  Of 5 KOPS members, four were visibly quite overweight, and the fifth looked anorexic.  I guess the four set high goal weights.

Chuckle. Despite the failings, I think the group has potential.   They claim over 300,000 members, so there may be more to the organization than I’m seeing in the local group.

Yup. After the meeting they all go out to dinner.  That aspect seems self-defeating to me.  I skipped the dinner.

The most successfull dieters in the national registry (the folks that don’t ask questions that low carbers can answer) don’t skip meals.  So I suggest that as long as it was a light meal it actually helped ther long term adherence.  On the other hand if they did the common 12-step thing of having cake and ice cream I agree.

Response:

After the meeting they all go out to dinner.  That aspect seems self-defeating to me.  I skipped the dinner.

The TOPS group in my area has always done this. My mother-in-law used to own the only eatery in town. I got a kick out of the warning shout from the waitresses "TOPS is here." But their orders were usually one-egg broccoli and cheese omelets, one slice of homemade raisin toast (a must!), and one slice of bacon or sausage. A bowl of oatmeal here or there, but nobody ever went "whole-hog" and got a farmer’s breakfast (pancakes, eggs, meat, toast, homefries) or anything like that. TOPS is still going strong around here (right, Laurie?), ‘cept now they meet on Thursday nights. They still get together at the diner after, but I think the chicken caesar salad is the meal of choice. They seem like a fun bunch of gals. If I had to do it over again, I wouldn’t mind losing with them. Amy 168/115/…

Response:

Igor, You are probably right. While I’m a bit calorie restricted, I spend a lot of time thinking about food related subjects, such as nutrition and dieting, so the group can be part of that agenda. I’m curious about the group’s politics, given its national scope and 300,000 members.  Also, I have wondered if some younger women might pop in from time to time…. I feel I’ve mastered this dieting thing.  To properly showoff, I need an audience.  I’m far enough below the weight of my friends, that the topic of weightloss is now impolite.  Relatives are starting to worry that I am losing weight too fast.  I’m thinking this can be a new venue for talking about dieting.  My best information is online, but direct human interaction has a function too.

– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – I would be greatly surprised if such a social setting would be in any way helpful to you personally, given what I know about you.  Personally, I am getting all encouragement and advice from these newsgroups that I need. — 223/173.1/180

Response:

The group I belong to has a lot of fun too. Some of them go to lunch every Wednesday after the meeting and continue to have slow, steady weight losses each week. I’ve never gone to lunch with them because it’s not at a convenient time for me, but I see nothing wrong with it. — Cheri – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – After the meeting they all go out to dinner.  That aspect seems self-defeating to me.  I skipped the dinner. The TOPS group in my area has always done this. My mother-in-law used to own the only eatery in town. I got a kick out of the warning shout from the waitresses "TOPS is here." But their orders were usually one-egg broccoli and cheese omelets, one slice of homemade raisin toast (a must!), and one slice of bacon or sausage. A bowl of oatmeal here or there, but nobody ever went "whole-hog" and got a farmer’s breakfast (pancakes, eggs, meat, toast, homefries) or anything like that. TOPS is still going strong around here (right, Laurie?), ‘cept now they meet on Thursday nights. They still get together at the diner after, but I think the chicken caesar salad is the meal of choice. They seem like a fun bunch of gals. If I had to do it over again, I wouldn’t mind losing with them. Amy 168/115/…

Response:

Cubit schreef: Igor, You are probably right. While I’m a bit calorie restricted, I spend a lot of time thinking about food related subjects, such as nutrition and dieting, so the group can be part of that agenda. I’m curious about the group’s politics, given its national scope

Better make that *inter*national scope. Don’t forget, it’s the *world* *wide* web! and 300,000 members.  Also, I have wondered if some younger women might pop in from time to time….

Sorry, I’m 49 (and happily married . I feel I’ve mastered this dieting thing.  To properly showoff, I need an audience.  I’m far enough below the weight of my friends, that the topic of weightloss is now impolite.  

Congratulations! Berna (101.5/75.5/~68 kg) — ( )_( ) Berna M. Bleeker-Slikker / http://www.volksliedjes.nl

Response:

   I was in TOPS for a while when I was dieting last year.  It was a very nice bunch of ladies, but I was uncomfortable with the whole set up myself.  They were all Christian church goers, I am agnostic.  The meeting were actually held in a church’s community room.  No one tried to convert me (I never mentioned my views on religion at all), but internally at least I still felt like an outsider.  The solemn chanting at the start and end of each meeting was pretty off putting to me.    I can see how the way this group is set up might be useful for some people, but it just wasn’t a good fit for me.     — Annie

Response:

– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -I had failed for 15 months to find a local support group for low carb. However, I have discovered a group with zillions of chapters that meet once a week.  It is non-profit and only costs $20 to join. http://www.tops.org/ They do not mind a person doing low carb. This is a very old organization.  Half of my local group is composed of women who are 70 years old, or older.  The group is very much in need of new blood.  24 members locally.  They are all women except for the one man that is the leader of the group.  He begged me to stay. They have several recitations that have a religious tone to them.  The theme seemed to be confessing their emotional eating….  (Not something I believe in.) I think the Peter Principle could be twisted to apply to the members. They have a subgroup called "KOPS" at the meeting, who are members who are at their goal weight.  Of 5 KOPS members, four were visibly quite overweight, and the fifth looked anorexic.  I guess the four set high goal weights. Despite the failings, I think the group has potential.   They claim over 300,000 members, so there may be more to the organization than I’m seeing in the local group. After the meeting they all go out to dinner.  That aspect seems self-defeating to me.  I skipped the dinner.

I’m not really familiar with them, but I do know that TOPS (Take Off Pounds Sensibly) has been around for many years. Dick Stephens

Response:

No they’re not. They were around before OA. It’s a good group, and inexpensive. You follow your own diet. However, as in any weight loss, your success or failure  is determined by yourself. — Cheri – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – As far as I know they are a spin-off from Overeaters Anonymous so they are a 12-step group.  12-step groups are some of the best support groups around.  I’ve read that OA has a better 5-year retention rate than any other system including WW. This makes sense given that they preach you need to come weekly for the rest of your life.

Response:

Cubit’s experience made me laugh. Like I mentioned, I was in a TOPS group overseas (Germany)- one of the only weekly events for a military wife to go to. I met some KOPS and some gals on the rebound and some losers-mostly it was social for us. I’d say we all had a few sizes in the closet. Te organization did have a place in our community. some of those gals were desperate to lose weight and far from home. We all had a common interest. We never dined together but I did attend the annual convention in Bavaria (for us) and drove down with a former Top loser of the year who now drove with 2 serious bags of snacks next to her. It was memorable- I toured Hitler’s salt mine- I can’t remember a thing about the actual convention….only the Oreos that sat next to my fellow TOPSEE I got my own motivation since I had a new baby and took the weigh-ins seriously. It was a 1500 cal diet I was familiar with and lost 30 pounds.  I had a nice charm bracelet that was getting a lot of charms on it.  I threw it out a few years ago when I didn’t care about my weight. That event was nothing compared to now- keeping off 55 pounds the only way a dinner meeting would work would be if you were learning to eat out and keep to your plan. Not rationalize bad eating, or justify bad behavior. The only way I can be an inspiration now is to keep the pounds off for good. For that I won’t need to utter a word. Diane

– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -I had failed for 15 months to find a local support group for low carb. However, I have discovered a group with zillions of chapters that meet once a week.  It is non-profit and only costs $20 to join. http://www.tops.org/ They do not mind a person doing low carb. This is a very old organization.  Half of my local group is composed of women who are 70 years old, or older.  The group is very much in need of new blood.  24 members locally.  They are all women except for the one man that is the leader of the group.  He begged me to stay. They have several recitations that have a religious tone to them.  The theme seemed to be confessing their emotional eating….  (Not something I believe in.) I think the Peter Principle could be twisted to apply to the members. They have a subgroup called "KOPS" at the meeting, who are members who are at their goal weight.  Of 5 KOPS members, four were visibly quite overweight, and the fifth looked anorexic.  I guess the four set high goal weights. Despite the failings, I think the group has potential.   They claim over 300,000 members, so there may be more to the organization than I’m seeing in the local group. After the meeting they all go out to dinner.  That aspect seems self-defeating to me.  I skipped the dinner.

Response:

– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – I had failed for 15 months to find a local support group for low carb. However, I have discovered a group with zillions of chapters that meet once a week.  It is non-profit and only costs $20 to join.  http://www.tops.org/ They do not mind a person doing low carb. This is a very old organization.  Half of my local group is composed of women who are 70 years old, or older.  The group is very much in need of new blood.  24 members locally.  They are all women except for the one man that is the leader of the group.  He begged me to stay. They have several recitations that have a religious tone to them.  The theme seemed to be confessing their emotional eating….  (Not something I believe in.) I think the Peter Principle could be twisted to apply to the members. They have a subgroup called "KOPS" at the meeting, who are members who are at their goal weight.  Of 5 KOPS members, four were visibly quite overweight, and the fifth looked anorexic.  I guess the four set high goal weights. Despite the failings, I think the group has potential.   They claim over 300,000 members, so there may be more to the organization than I’m seeing in the local group. After the meeting they all go out to dinner.  That aspect seems self-defeating to me.  I skipped the dinner.

I can’t tell you how much I disliked TOPS and their twelve step touch feely program. I was a member in the late 1970’s and left after one meeting. I renamed it FLOPS! maybe I am just too much of a loner although WW meetings worked for me for a long time. I’ve done it with great help from ASD on the Net. It’s been my favorite group because we are not held to a tight agenda. — Diva ***** The Best Man For The Job Is A Woman

Response:

I would be greatly surprised if such a social setting would be in any way helpful to you personally, given what I know about you.  Personally, I am getting all encouragement and advice from these newsgroups that I need.

Yikes, tovarich..what do you know? — Diva ***** The Best Man For The Job Is A Woman

Response:

– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – This is a very old organization.  Half of my local group is composed of women who are 70 years old, or older.  The group is very much in need of new blood.  24 members locally.  They are all women except for the one man that is the leader of the group.  He begged me to stay. They have several recitations that have a religious tone to them.  The theme seemed to be confessing their emotional eating….  (Not something I believe in.) I think the Peter Principle could be twisted to apply to the members. They have a subgroup called "KOPS" at the meeting, who are members who are at their goal weight.  Of 5 KOPS members, four were visibly quite overweight, and the fifth looked anorexic.  I guess the four set high goal weights. Despite the failings, I think the group has potential.   They claim over 300,000 members, so there may be more to the organization than I’m seeing in the local group. After the meeting they all go out to dinner.  That aspect seems self-defeating to me.  I skipped the dinner.

 This is exactly how it was when I went to meetings over 20 years ago, right down to the self-defeating "going out to dinner" after the meeting.  It was always our cheat night.  And I remember the whole weigh in process a lot of the ladies did…strip off all jewelry and go take a pee.  We would have ladies exclaim that they were losing fat because there was bubbles in their urine…that was the fat leaving their body, they would excitedly claim (and no one disputed them).  The bitching at the poor gal manning the scale that evening, because after all, she had to be doing something wrong because the "weighee" had been so good all week.  The roll call, and when someone reported a gain, a snide chorus of, "See ya lighter!" ensued. Then our one KOPS member, who reached her goal by eating only three tins of tuna a day, but filled out her food sheets to reflect differently. But, that was just the group I was in.  I just live in a weird area. Obviously the group as an organization is doing well, it has stood the test of time overall. Lisa

Response:

After the meeting they all go out to dinner.  That aspect seems self-defeating to me.  I skipped the dinner.

There’s a TOPS group in the town where we go for dinner once a week.  You’re correct in they go out to EAT after their meetings.  We often see them (we recognize members of the group)  in the places we go.  You wouldn’t believe how much food they consume from the all-you-can-eat bar at Shoney’s etc. And all of them are obese.   I don’t think they’re a group really serious about losing weight. — Wysong Age 60.  Height 5′6" 171/ 164 / 140 lb Starting date LC 7/01 at 207lbs Stopped losing on LC 11/01 at 165lbs NOW WALKING 1.5 to 3 MILES DAY.

Response:

I had failed for 15 months to find a local support group for low carb. However, I have discovered a group with zillions of chapters that meet once a week.  It is non-profit and only costs $20 to join.  http://www.tops.org/ They do not mind a person doing low carb. This is a very old organization.  Half of my local group is composed of women who are 70 years old, or older.  The group is very much in need of new blood.  24 members locally.  They are all women except for the one man that is the leader of the group.  He begged me to stay. They have several recitations that have a religious tone to them.  The theme seemed to be confessing their emotional eating….  (Not something I believe in.) I think the Peter Principle could be twisted to apply to the members. They have a subgroup called "KOPS" at the meeting, who are members who are at their goal weight.  Of 5 KOPS members, four were visibly quite overweight, and the fifth looked anorexic.  I guess the four set high goal weights. Despite the failings, I think the group has potential.   They claim over 300,000 members, so there may be more to the organization than I’m seeing in the local group. After the meeting they all go out to dinner.  That aspect seems self-defeating to me.  I skipped the dinner.

Response:

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