Christianity QA

Question:

A Fleece Jacket from Old Navy

– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – I’ve been trying to Christmas shop online, and I’m driving myself crazy over what to get my future DIL. She doesn’t want clothing.  She doesn’t wear jewelry. I know she likes coffee, and I asked my son how about if I make her up a basket of flavored coffees, and he said "NO!"  He doesn’t have a clue what she likes, but he says he knows what she doesn’t like.  Seems like there’s an awful lot of things this girl doesn’t like.  I’ve thought of a gift certificate, but I would like her to have a present to open.  I could get a gift certificate AND something.  But what??? I don’t even know this girl, and neither does my son, or he’d have some suggestions.  At the dinner I had with her parents, I asked her mother for suggestions, and she said a sweater.. and since then, my son has announced that this girl "hates" sweaters.  Who the hell hates sweaters?  This is ridiculous. I’m beginning to resent her, just because I feel frustrated.  Anybody have any suggestions? Sara

Response:

Hi Sara I am a Christian as well.  I have to ask, is Christianity a relatively new thing for your son?  The reason I ask is I have seen so many "new" Christians that are so on fire that sometimes they miss the mark.  Finger pointing and condemnation are not the way to go.  Living as a "quiet" example goes a lot further.  These are things your son will learn as he matures in his faith. As far as the gift, there are so many good Christian contemporary artists who are releasing new CD’s this season.  There is one in particular Becky may like called "Point of Grace".  Don’t stress, Becky will be thankful for whatever you give her. Missy

Hi Missy, No, sadly enough he became a Christian in middle school, about age 13, and he’ll be 25 in January. He’s even a deacon in the church! Sometimes he gets hung up on legalism and forgets grace.  For the most part he’s a great guy, but he gets too zealous at times and it’s a bit difficult to deal with.  I was so angry with him last night, and today I’m better .  He and Becky are coming over sometime today, it’s her birthday, and I’m going to ask HER what she would like for Christmas, and leave him to himself.  BTW, for her birthday, I got her a scarf, hat and gloves.  He seemed to "approve" (Like I care at this point). One observation, he doesn’t mind getting presents himself!  He’s still wearing the sweater I bought for him last Christmas!  Sigh. Sara

Response:

Here’s what I THINK is going on:  He’s real religious, and sometimes that makes him an a-hole.  I am NOT knocking Christianity, I am a Christian myself.

Hi Sara I am a Christian as well.  I have to ask, is Christianity a relatively new thing for your son?  The reason I ask is I have seen so many "new" Christians that are so on fire that sometimes they miss the mark.  Finger pointing and condemnation are not the way to go.  Living as a "quiet" example goes a lot further.  These are things your son will learn as he matures in his faith. As far as the gift, there are so many good Christian contemporary artists who are releasing new CD’s this season.  There is one in particular Becky may like called "Point of Grace".  Don’t stress, Becky will be thankful for whatever you give her. Missy

Response:

Hi Sara I think your idea of a gift basket with flavored coffee is a wonderful idea. I love giving and receiving gift baskets. Its a shame your son vetoed that idea. I bet  your future DIL would have loved it if she loves coffee. I hope you can find something that you think she would like. It is very frustrating when someone is hard to buy for like that. Deb – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – I’ve been trying to Christmas shop online, and I’m driving myself crazy over what to get my future DIL. She doesn’t want clothing.  She doesn’t wear jewelry. I know she likes coffee, and I asked my son how about if I make her up a basket of flavored coffees, and he said "NO!"  He doesn’t have a clue what she likes, but he says he knows what she doesn’t like.  Seems like there’s an awful lot of things this girl doesn’t like.  I’ve thought of a gift certificate, but I would like her to have a present to open.  I could get a gift certificate AND something.  But what??? I don’t even know this girl, and neither does my son, or he’d have some suggestions.  At the dinner I had with her parents, I asked her mother for suggestions, and she said a sweater.. and since then, my son has announced that this girl "hates" sweaters.  Who the hell hates sweaters?  This is ridiculous. I’m beginning to resent her, just because I feel frustrated.  Anybody have any suggestions? Sara

Response:

Maybe she’s really not that bad.  Maybe he’s just making it worse.  After you give her the gift say something like, "Is it what you wanted?  I found it kind of hard to buy you a gift since I don’t know you that well yet, what is it you like to get?"  Then she will be polite, hopefully, and say, "oh, I like anything really?"  Then say, "oh, so you would have liked some perfume, or coffee, or etc…"  then she’ll say, "oh yea, coffee great, I’m a big coffee drinker." and you’ll say, "oh really, well my son said you wouldn’t like that."  Then if he doesn’t like the gift, which I doubt that she will not, she can talk to her fianc

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